RESILIENCE

Today was my eighth and last appointment with my counselor in Toronto. It's been a very valuable experience, meeting with him. I've been encouraged (often affirmed that I'm normal), learned a lot and gained new insights and perspectives into the burnout recovery process.

One of the marks of a fully recovered person is a rebuilt "resilience." By that, it means that the person is capable of handling the stresses of life again because they have integrated enough life-giving elements into their lifestyle. I'm not there yet, but one of the ways I'm getting there is I'm exploring more of who God has made me to be so that my next job or ministry role will be more in line with my strengths.

My counselor gave me a list of books to explore on this topic and he also gave me a book to start with. It's called "Don't Waste Your Talent" by Bob McDonald and Don E. Hutcheson. I'm really excited to start reading it.

I once came across a definition of burnout as when a forest has been gutted by a fire. I feel like that's what has happened to me. Through this time, God has burned away everything that I thought was true about myself. And now I can see and examine the new growth poking out from among the ashes. Praise God!

On a side note, whenever I hear the word "resilience," I will always think of this exchange I had with a friend while we were in Italy:

Me: Wow, these pigeons are resilient!
Friend: Really? How do you know?
Me: Look at them, people are throwing stuff at them and kicking at them and they still stay there.
Friend: So?
Me: So they're resilient!
Friend: Oh! Resilient!! I thought you said the pigeons were Brazilian!!!

CONSIDER IT DONE

Christ said, "Let us go to the other side" - not to the middle of the lake to be drowned.
~Dan Crawford

This thought is very comforting to me. It's because Christ was fully intending to bring his disciples to the other side of the lake that he could sleep while the storm was raging and the waves rose higher and higher. His disciples had not taken him for his word, and so they panicked.

Today marks exactly 6 months since I came home to rest. And half a year later, I don't feel like too much progress has been made. But I know that even though I may feel like I'm still stuck in the middle of the lake, God's invitation to me was to go to the other side. So I can take His word in faith and stop despairing. Because He always finishes what He starts.