EXTRAVAGANT

[edit: I just realized I already posted this on my other blog.  Oops!  Oh well... :) ]

Back in December, work pressure had been slowly building up and I'd found myself fighting to see myself as valuable apart from my work.  One such morning, I sat there desperate before the Lord.  I prayed that He would help me see myself as He saw me.

I was surprised when the text that came to mind was Matthew 13:44, "The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field."  What did that have to do with my question? I wondered.

As I sat there with the text, it suddenly made sense.  I had always taken the verse to mean that we are to be like the man who sells it all for the joy of finding the gospel.  I suddenly realized that the man in the story is not us.  The man in the story is God!  We are the treasure that He finds and gives up everything to acquire!  The parable was about God and His heart towards us!  We are the field that He sees the value hidden in and He already gave everything He had in order to buy us.

It makes me think about my response as one who claims to follow Him.  Do I look at each person I encounter and see their hidden treasure?  Would I pull out all the stops to let these people know how valuable they are?

I am God's treasure.  How amazing is that?!

SEEKING A DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE

Something I've noticed in myself and as I've chatted with various people who've gone through the burnout process is that quite often, a person will want to find new ways of experiencing and relating to God.  Their relationship to God becomes part and parcel of the complete overhaul that is happening in the rest of their life.

In my own journey these past two plus years, I've come across some very life-giving practices in the areas of prayer and scripture reading.  I'll be the first to admit that I am a complete novice at this and I've only just begun to dip my toe in the ocean.  But I'll share a few favourites from what I have learned so far in hopes that maybe one of these approaches would be of help to a fellow journeyer along the path towards encountering Christ.  You may notice differences between these practices I am going to list and those of the "normal" evangelical tradition: the prayer doesn't necessarily involve speaking to God and the scripture reading engages the imagination.

• Centering Prayer:  This has become a beloved practice to me as many times it's helped still the incessant chatter in my soul and mind (it is also sometimes called a breath prayer).  Start by sitting in a comfortable chair, close your eyes, let your body relax and notice your breathing.  Choose a word or phrase that you associate with calmness to "center" yourself upon (eg, Jesus, peace) - personally I've been using the phrase "Be still".  In rhythm of your inhale and exhale, think of your word or phrase - so in my case, inhale would correspond to "be" and exhale would correspond to "still".  As you fall into the rhythm of your breathing, picture yourself in a serene place and become attentive to the love of God surrounding you. A helpful image for me has been to picture myself as a rock with the stream of God's love flowing all around me.  If distracting thoughts arise (which they will!), simply let them go (I picture them floating by on little leaves) and come back to your word/phrase. The "goal" of this prayer is for your soul to become quiet and aware of the presence and love of God around you.
  

• Imaginative reading:  This practice is wonderful especially for getting to know Jesus in the gospels.  The idea behind this is that just as friends get to know each other through shared experiences, we can get to know Jesus by sharing experiences with him through our imagination.  Pick a passage, read it slowly, and read it as many times as you want.  As you read, picture yourself in the scene.  Notice Jesus - his tone of voice, his body language, his responses.  Notice those around you.  Notice yourself - who are you in the scene?  what are you feeling?  what do you learn about yourself?  about Jesus?

• Lighting a candle:  The gesture of lighting a candle and acknowledging the light of Christ with you is a simple way of reminding yourself visually that God is with you as you spend time with Him.  Personally, I have created a space for myself consisting of a comfortable chair, and next to it a small table on which is a nice looking tablecloth, a candle and a green plant.  I often keep my bible and journal on this table as well.  This is my "quiet place" where I go to to reconnect with the love of God most mornings.

Since burning out, my former habit of very structured bible reading and prayer times has pretty much gone out the window.  In its place, my times with God have become more organic and engage deeper parts of myself.  I still think there is a place for disciplined times with the Lord, but I also believe that for those in this season of recovery, less is really more.