SLOW

Postings have been slow as of late. It's been hard for me to sit down and think when I've had so much to clean and so many boxes to unpack. I think moving has taken a lot out of me.

I do however still feel like I'm walking the road of recovery. It's tempting to try and "take my temperature" every day, checking on whether I've progressed or not. But once in a while, when I actually look back and compare myself to where I was at half a year ago, three months ago, or even a month ago, I feel a sense of relief - because I know I'm actually getting better.

This past week for the first time in a very long time, I felt like I actually cared for those around the world who don't know Jesus. It was just a moment, like a flicker of a long-lost spark. And I've actually felt excited to meet my new neighbours here.

I still feel like I'm treading water when it comes to taking care of myself. Deciding what to eat is one of the biggest challenges of my day. Deciding what to do comes a close second. Sometimes I wonder how I'll ever feel competent enough to take care of a family. But I need to trust that the grace I need will be there when the time comes.